Reluctance

December 9, 2017
2 min read

The last 20 years since I was conscious,I was too busy finishing my spiritual karma of many lifetimes. At 41,I knew I had achieved that particular karma which is secret. Although I have attained material success also and the status of a millionaire ready to retire, that attainment was but a rock in front of a mountain compared to my spiritual achievement within that same period.

Two years after mastery, despite being ready to take on the challenge of becoming a billionaire by 60 and richest man by 80, I feel quite dead. By that I mean that I am so identified with my soul , I feel like a student in a class he doesn’t want to be. I feel I could be dead , though the transition would momentarily be painful. Dead and in that spiritual plane of mine where I am God. Down here or embodied I have to abide to the laws of nature , restrictions of my own being and everything that come with it.

My reality matches my spiritual realm of total quietude and peace.

I have a very important message to give the world in the coming 60 years. No one can stop me.

it is just that still I wish I didn’t have to take on this burden of having to lead the world on a new path. Instead I wish my journey ended here and I could enjoy life as a millionaire inside and outside. Why do I need to prove the world a Nepali boy too can become the richest man of earth and contribute to the history of the world with the power of his habits ? To me such vanity has no meaning. I have no desire for being idolized. Truly I idolize myself and that one follower is more than enough for me.

Still I know I cannot waste this life that I could carry on from in the next one. But it would put the history of the world thousands of years back. No I have a mission to fulfill and I can’t just let this immense power born of my particular but repeatable lifestyle . Even if I tried or even intended, god would talk me out of this thought.

But here I am, the reluctant hero to be. Let’s see how things go from here.

Can’t stop. Gotta keep moving. Magic coming ahead.