Looking from high up
At 48, I have dropped all my ambitions when others peak with their ambitions. I have chosen a play along strategy. At times I think of how people are living at the same time as I am vis-a-vis what I am doing, for example, swimming in peak hour. At that time others are probably doing…
Adjusting for samadhi
Lately I am feeling different. May be I have become more tolerant and less anxious about career and life. Maybe I feel more certain about my destiny. My samadhi is become more perfect. Thus I need to meditate more intensely during exercise time and may be that is causing the tiredness. I am able to…
The science of creation
I am feeling tired since a few days. May be it is due to the stomach ache I had or may be it is due to a shift in my consciousness. I feel different. I feel like I have figured the final piece of puzzle of life and that I am thus tired. I think…
Today’s teenagers
Few days back I had a relatively severe shock after talking with my son about how he spent his free time. I admited he watched youtube channels of youths about half cooked truths and conspiracy material. I had a stomach disorder upon this finding because I thought he was mature enough. the good thing is…
Rigid but flexible
I am finding a different kind of peace lately. It is coming out of flexibity. I am no more rigid, not that I was so rigid. But now I have mastered an art of being rigid with my goal but being flexible with the process. I guess is just needed to take time. I have…
Manoharism
I am back from the kakani trip that I had been dreading. It is now over with. Something peculiar occured this time. I just left like I had died and my soul was flying away. I thought “this is how it must be after I die.” I recalled no one, nothing. But one thing came,…
New role
It is my first day as a counselor at a new office with nothing to do. This is the normal life for most adults in the first hours of work. It was even the same for me when I was at various organisations. I guess I lost touch since it has been so long ago….
Relationships strategy
Even I may have lost much rapport with my wife like the millions of couples. I wish it was not like that and I think i tried a lot but there are things you cannot change in your spouse. She is so good and for everyone that she forgets or doesn’t have time and energy…
new avatar
I had cortisol filled evening yesterday after my son said that people humilated me because i behaved childishly. This was the last straw in a series of humiliation from a series of people for being friendly, opening debate and building a positive environment. They became so confident out of my own expense that now they…
Finding my truth
New feelings are rising in me. Especially that I have nothing I want to give or to take from others. However I have open to anything that others want to give or take from me. What does that imply or even mean, I am myself confused at times and thus I am writing this blog…