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Dropping the ideas

Mon, Mar 11, 2019

Published (Nepali)

It has been a long break this month. i had forgotten that just 4 months ago i was wanting to become a billionaire with an idea like Uber or airbnb. then I read a book and i saw that it was no way the life that i wanted to live at all.

After reaching the base of the mountain of my idea, I saw the hugeness of the idea and thus chose not to even try climbing it further.

I was just happy having reached the base and seeing the big vision i had seen. I went through so many thick jungles of confusion.

Reaching upto that point was fun and in nature. But climbing that mountain alone was suicide and getting a team would have ruined me financially and spiritually.

So I dropped the idea.

However I started the idea in the first place because I wanted to prove something to myself: that i could become a billionaire if i wanted to.

I used to have strong negative feelings, kind of depression whenever i thought of not trying this company before. When I was being an entrepreneur, i was having a tough time, but no negative feelings, no depression.

Now that I have even closed my companies, I feel total satisfaction. I will never become a billionaire and it is ok.

I promised myself I would create an empire for myself by myself but then such things just don’t matter at all for me. It is amazing how I realize about my life.

At one point after dropping the idea, i felt aimless. But then flood of work was thrown at me proving to me i had to quit the ideas.

Still a glimmer of hope is still there that may be someday those 2 ideas will become a reality and I would become a billionaire as I was destined to be. But I would not settle the traditional way.

For now life is different. it is unthinkably calmer, easier.

Definitely it was a karma i had to clear. During that time I was really deluded into thinking I was an entrepreneur. But I was destined to fail anyhow because my nature was incompatible.

May be if i was born into the family of a billionaire, things would have been different and still i would have run away as i could not be free.