I am feeling unusually slow and peaceful. I feel like doing nothing. May be I am tired but with an increased meat diet, physical tiredness has decreased a lot. I think I am tired of living and its monotony. It is not that I am seeking andrenalin rush. I also don’t want that. I am too lazy to be lazy.
My ambitions have dwindled. I don’t want to be that hot shot consultant for a big bank. I don’t know if I want to puruse being the counselor for the college. May be i just scrap by.
So I am just flowing with the wind of habits. It is good that I have made good or great habits. What else to do?
But this state of mine is nothing to be alarmed with. However it is quite new. I always had ambitions. Yes I still have one crazy ambition: to be buddha after 60, go to America and fulfill my destiny. But in not time 10 years will pass and most likely I will not become recognized as the buddha, it will another delusion I had, then.
Untrue is that many of my maddest ambitions came true:
- being so rich I can swim everyday
- becoming a brand
- getting work while relaxing
- traveling in the right amount
- synchronicity
